The following are the recorded responses of Eyazahrid to the feedback he received on the above listed chapter and the story in general for the week following. This document is to serve as a replacement to the traditional Author’s Note at the beginning and ending of chapters and will be kept separate from both the above listed chapter and any future chapters unless deemed sufficiently important.
“wonder how naruto will handel his identity being out in konoha”
I’d say that would have to depend on how other people handle knowing his identity. The real question is how Konoha will take it.
“I stumbled on this story recently and can sincerely say I enjoyed it, but recently I’ve become concerned. I enjoyed the premise, the intrigue and how characters interacted. Stories change as they develop but it seems that this one has lost the cohesion it had to begin with. Characters and plot lines are seemingly forgotten and new ones spring in place but it’s hard to be invested knowing that they could be simply left out for so many chapters with little consequence.
This relationship drama you introduced with Mai seems a repeat of what was happening with Anko’s recent insecurity over what her relationship with Naruto was before it was left behind, and has not done much for her character. This is supposed to be Naruto’s right hand and future successor but whenever it seems she has a problem that isnt excessive paperwork or something that can’t be solved by throwing the wolves at it she runs for the “other woman.”
I have no issue with characters having flaws but it seems that the story has a massive weight dragging it on the slow burn and even as more plans and plot lines are created and dropped in the mix it feels aimless. Many characters react to the world promise some action of threat after many chapters without a word and…repeat.”
A lot of plans have been scrapped over the years in response to reader feedback. If there was a large, unified dislike for something I would try to wrap it up or even drop the matter entirely. Some things are more obvious than others, but all of them were an effort to provide my audience with something more pleasing to their palates.
I have a list I will be releasing upon Sealkeeper’s conclusion filled with all the things removed from the story. When I eventually get back to rewriting the story I’ll do my best to incorporate those as seamlessly as possible.
“good chapter, interesting the discussion about sealkeeper, but kinda would like naruto also learn to do seals by himself and become amazing seal master instead of depending too much of his father seal hacking like his manga counterpart depended of his father kyuubi seal.
And finally mei confirmed tsukuyomi true identity, can’t waitfor her to reveal it to konoha.”
While that could be fun, “Sealmaster Naruto” is not the focus of this story and it’s far too late to change that. At most he will have a basic understanding of seals which he employs to better utilize Sealkeeper.
“That sure is embarrassing that the mizukage knows but the hokage doesn’t…
And Naruto will get infinite /never-ending Chakra… Well he had to abuse the ridiculousness of sealkeeper at some point…
I am supprised that orochimaru doesn’t know about the Chakra withdrawal though, has kabuto been keeping secrets? Overall a very good and plot laying chapter, still curious if “sasuke” will draw Konoha attention though…”
Not quite, that would be far too overpowered. He should have something comparable to Uzumaki reserves y the end of everything, though, and I suppose compared to some that very well could be considered “infinite”.
Perhaps I missed it, but I don’t recall and didn’t see a part in which Orochimaru learned of the Chakra Withdrawal Naruto had gone through. However, Orochimaru was informed of it by Naruto in chapter 52 when they were discussing his seal and the Ten no Juin.
I had plans for Sasuke but we’ll see if I find a spot for them as I try to keep things more Naruto-centric.
“Finally having this addressed! I have been wondering if we were ever gonna do something about his chakra. Sure his different situation has caused a massive personality shift, but it can’t be Naruto if he has s*** chakra abilities.”
Yes, this has been the plan since I did a basic overview of the Ten no Juin in chapter 52. It took more time than I had expected for things to be ready for it to come back into play.
“Okay for one great chapter, but if I’m being completely honest I think a one shot about Ganju’s backstory and his antics would be so much better”
I do believe that’s already been added to the backlog. One of these days I’ll actually sit down and compile a list of all the projects I have waiting to be worked on.
“Omg Sai really did a good one on Hana and i think that the consecuences for him are gonna be real bad! hahaha
im sad that you decided to not include an insight to Mai’s POV or Tsume’s as their interactions are really nice to read but i understand that you might on the chapters to come.
i know that some people already asked and you already answered but… i would like to see what the children of Aü are up to… and how will they contact Naruto as it was stated that he left the amulet on the training ground?
oh btw i love ganju and his “boys”
sorry for this being my first review to you story but i usually read on my mobile using a really arcane app that has no use but to read.
love your story and i hope i can get enough money to at least contribute a little on the orange page that starts with a P”
I’m trying to keep things more Naruto-centric as Sealkeeper continues and due to the highly negative responses that came from Mai and Tsume being together again I don’t plan to show any further interactions between the two of them.
Chapter 119 will give you some insight to the Children of Au, you need only be patient for a bit longer. It was not, however, stated that he had left the amulet in the training ground. He was wearing it as the scene ended. [Chapter 113, final scene. Last three lines.]
I appreciate the intent but don’t worry about any contributions.
“I’ve had my thoughts about this, being so old. So as not to be biased, I checked on the story. Seven chapters in and it’s just like all the ‘Abandoned Naruto’ stories that I’ve not read past initial chapters. I wasn’t corrected in this story.
With inability of people writing anything of substance, something that doesn’t contradict the canon so much, it’s a disappointment to see the state of fanfiction community.
I’m happy to have found stories to keep entertained, that I forget such sorry attempts at rewriting the canon.
Good luck, anyway, with writing your own ‘masterpiece’.”
I could go on for a while on this but I don’t have much time left so I’ll keep it brief. I would hazard a guess that the reason a lot of those storiews are similar are because, as you said, you only read initial chapters. If you don’t give them a chance to diverge how could they be different? They’re all variations on a theme, after all.
On the same subject, you say “not corrected.” You read seven of over a hundred chapters there, mate. I’m not sure what dramatic changes you were expecting in such a small portion of the story.
Lastly, if you don’t like the state of the fanfiction community you might do well to stop whining and actually write something yourself. It’s not going to get any better without fresh points of view contributing their ideas and styles.
A bad story will still remain infinitely better than one you’ve never written and a written story unshared holds no value. I’d be very happy for you to write something better than my own work as it would continue to help keep this community alive. If you’d like someone to bounce ideas off or need some help feel free to reach out to me.