By Raven’s Wings – Posted 9.23.2019
The following are the recorded responses of Eyazahrid to the feedback he received on the above listed chapter and the story in general for the week following. This document is to serve as a replacement to the traditional Author’s Note at the beginning and ending of chapters and will be kept separate from both the above listed chapter and any future chapters unless deemed sufficiently important.
I’ve been mostly avoiding- or, that’s been the intention- quoting each and every review I respond to but it’s become evident looking back that I’ve been including them more and more. So, for purely experimental purposes- and not so I don’t have to summarize- I’ll try this commentary with the full reviews
And I suppose I really don’t have to worry about how long this is because it’s not a part of the chapter.
Biju
“Great chapter the best part where either danzo swearing or the ten tails of nope! Hilarious! And if yagura pisses Naruto of enough it will be 13 tails of nope! (on that front can we get an estimate of the bijuu genders or are they all female?) well Naruto will need additional firepower against pain anyway…” – Wicked.A
Generally, I was assuming that after Karura any Biju encountered would be female and I would make exceptions. Mainly i was going to keep the Hachibi Male and everything else was more or less a toss-up.
Upon consideration, however, the thought of turning Gyuki into a sassy black woman is beyond tempting.
So yes, I’m probably making them all female.
Danzou
Apparently chill Danzou is still very popular which is great because he’s fun to write. Giving him a successor and reminding him of his morality has gone a long way to relaxing him.
Akatsuki
“Somehow I feel nearly the entirety of Akatsuki will end up under his sway. Kisame and Sasori mos certainly at least. Hidan will likely be butchered by the wolves for blasphemy and I doubt he’ll want to spend the capital to keep Kakuzu on retainer. The rest are a toss up.” – TheGreatBubbaJ
I think Sasori and Deidara may find themselves in the company of the Subaku family for a bit, but there’s a very good chance of Kisame finding himself pulled into Naruto’s circle of influence. Or, at the very least, being affected by it.
Especially because Tobi is a good girl.
As for the others, well, we’ll have to see.
And, on a related note, I’ll add this bit from another review;
“Sasori and Deidara chatting with Gaara and Kankuro was one of the best conversations in your fic, I swear. Even though your plot is serious I’m really glad to see the humorous oddities of powerful ninja continue to extend to Akatsuki. Obviously it was like that in canon, but it’s still nice to have confirmation that the rather colorful villains will get their chance to shine.” – CamTheTheif
I continue to stick by the idea that success in the Shinobi world is determined solely by one’s instability and while others might argue, I would say that the members of Akatsuki have been successful.
You know, in their own sort of way.
Of course there’s also probably something to say about being some of the most powerful people in the world. I’d assume you’re much more relaxed if you generally don’t have any threats to worry about. And even if that’s only by perception you’re still being left alone by the majority of potential irritants. I’m sure that would go a long way to improve their mood.
Really, though, it’s because having powerful Shinobi be unhinged to varying degrees is just too much fun.
Mito
“Actually, I’m not sure if I missed it or just forgot, but whatever did happen to Mito?” -DPSS
I know my memory is rather shoddy- there’s no denying that- but I’m pretty sure I answered this in last week’s commentary too. In case I did not, I’ll answer it again here.
She’s in Naruko’s tummy, where she’s been for, well, the entirety of the series. In the seal on her tummy, to be more specific.
As for her ability to communicate with Naruto, she has regained some access into his seal {She’s close enough that she can again reach the bars} but she is unable to speak to him through the Sealscape. He, however, could visit her though he has no idea of her presence and really no desire to interact with her after their parting.
Light
“This was lighter than your last couple of chapters. Thank you I needed that this morning had a rough weekend. Great stuff. 100 chapters is a hell of a milestone, I wonder what you have planned for it.” – Home of the Brave
and
“I feel like theres no more seriousness to how you’re writing now. Each pov is starting to sound the same and its making me sad my guy” – WarFlower
Both relate to the idea that the story is lightening up which, honestly, should probably have people being just a bit more uneasy.
I’m not sure if it’s a good thing, but even I’ve come to notice- and I’m often oblivious- that my story moves in cycles. It will start to lighten up and characters will start to settle into a peaceful normality and then I as God-Author will disrupt their newfound serenity and plunge them into darkness for a time.
Is it good storywriting? No idea. Does it mean things may become more dark and serious shortly? Yeah, there’s a pretty good chance.
It should be fun.
Direction
“At first this story had potential to be great, but here we are at ch99 just going around in circles, just updating this story for the sake of updating and frankly thus story is going nowhere and it’s going to be a disappoinment. What I think this story need is a rewrite and an actual storyline and you actually need to visualize were this story is heading and that is all I have to say. Take it or leave it, it’s just the opinion of a guy but this story has no future and need a rewrite or to scrape it entirely. No flame just stating my opinion.” – johnycage802
First, yes. I’ve been updating for the sake of updating for more than 90 chapters now. We’ve established that.
A rewrite may eventually happen, but not until long after I’ve managed to finish the story.
I do, however, know exactly where the story is going.
What I don’t have is any idea what’s goign to happen between now and that end.
Well, I have a general idea and a couple thing’s I’d like to see but nothing in stone.
I will most certainly have to respectfully disagree that this story has no future because I have promised to finish it. Is it some shinning gold future of promise? No idea. Will I somehow manage to achieve the ending I have planned? I’d damn well better.
Regardless, it will not be scraped.
Ever
General Response and Closing
Overall the response to this chapter was positive, which isn’t something I can say for the chapter I posted this morning. Hopefully Chapter 101 will go better.
Until I next have your attention,
– Eyazahrid